being 18, it still hasnt hit me that hard. im still enjoying my teenage youth, still slacking around, still procrastinating, still so full of mischief and tantrums. and most of the time, i still let my emotions cloud my judgement & decisions, which is bad. i am still in my comfort zone. maybe there's a part of me who doesnt want to grow up, i mean who does kan and a part of me is denying the fact that sooner or later, i'm gonna become an actual adult, a boring lame ass adult. ergh, do i have to grow up and take responsibilities? (cries a river)

i still dont have a clear idea of what i want to be when i grow up, all i know is i want to be successful in what ever i do and help people out, thats all, nothing specific. my life is so dull and boring, tak tahu la nak nangis ke gelak.

2015 is ending in a few days, which is craaaaazy??!?! but seriously tho, where has all the time went? what actual good deeds have i done this year? will i actually make it by the end of 2016? like any other person, i want to accomplish so much next year, i plan on doing big things, and insyaAllah i will.

lets just put this in mind, im gonna be 19 next year, 9-fucking-teen. its scares me, a lot. im not ready for adulthood, im not ready for full responsibilities of anything. i cant even take control of my own room, let alone any other thing. haih, this is hard, i dont wanna grow old, all wrinkly and saggy and all that shit.

haha, 19, im done